Life as a New Mom: Pass Interference

There are many fun activities you and your one-year-old can share, but watching football is not one of them. LESSON LEARNED. In case you were living on an uninhabited island and were unaware of this fact, Alabama played Texas A&M Saturday afternoon in what was billed as the most important game of the College Football Season thus far. Kind of a big deal.

I'd planned to make queso and chicken wings for myself and my husband. I thought our daughter would be content to hang in her Pack-N-Play while Mom and Dad watched the Tide roll. It would be a fun family affair.

I was wrong. So, so wrong. Dolly turned into a shrieking she-beast about two minutes before kickoff. It was one of those DEFCON ZERO fits, the kind that cannot be consoled. She needed a nap but being stubborn as her mom, she refused to go down without a fight. I attempted to appease her with offerings of snacks, juice, and various toys, all of which were refused.

I gave up. Dolly and I went to play in her nursery and I missed the ENTIRE FIRST HALF of the game. I understand that in the grand scheme of things, this is no big deal. Football season comes and goes, but I only have one baby. That's why I skipped out on a game I'd been anticipating for a year.  Dolly and I played until she finally decided that a nap was a solid option for her.

She napped until the beginning of fourth quarter. She awoke with a renewed energy and vigor that could not be contained in the Pack-N-Play. That meant she was only happy in running back and forth across the living room. I swear, it's like she has some sort of sixth sense that urges her to play with dangerous items.

Guess what that meant for me? I spent fourth quarter literally chasing my daughter back and forth across the living room. I felt as exhausted as A&M's defense after spending an afternoon attempting to hold back the Tide.

There were about three minutes left in the game when Dolly realized it was past her bath time. Shrieking Banshee Mode was activated again. I was now chasing a screaming toddler while watching the last three minutes of the most stressful football game I've seen in decades. It was too much. Dolly is screaming at me; I'm screaming at Johnny Football, and we're both running back and forth, back and forth, back and forth across the living room.

I don't think I'll ever be able to watch football the same way again... as long as Dolly's awake. I was too tired to even attempt an at-home version of "Rammer Jammer." I was more concerned with bathtime, jammies, and bed.

This weekend's game goes down at Bryant-Denny. We don't have tickets, but the good news: it's a night game. Roll Tide.