Pumpkin spice lattes are my jam. I tolerate a pumpkin spice cookie, but when it comes to these seven monstrosities, I cannot--and shall never--abide.

Fall is 100% The Most Amazing Time of the Year. This is indisputable fact. As the days grow shorter and the leaves fall, my wardrobe becomes exponentially more amazing and I reach my peak and most powerful form. Don't even try to disagree. Y'all know autumn is the one true season.

Does my love for fall make me super basic? Maybe. But I am okay with that. The arrival of pumpkin spice items signifies the start of fall, and businesses have learned how to lure us basic chicks in to stores and restaurants in droves by harnessing the power of the pumpkin. HOO BOY, have some of these people gone too far...

Below is a list of seven REAL pumpkin spice items available. Please grab a bucket or cup; you may feel the urge to puke.

1. Cedar's Pumpkin Spice Hummus
2. Pumpkin Spice Four Loko
3. Pumpkin Spice Pringles
4. Nature's Choice Orgainic Pumpkin Spice Chicken Sausage
5. Jell-O Pumpkin Spice Pudding
6. JIF Pumpkin Pie Spice Peanut Butter Whipped Spread
7. Wrigley's Extra Pumpkin Pie Spice Chewing Gum

I feel like I am going to hurl. SAUSAGE? HUMMUS? People, chill. This is getting ridiculous.

Put down the pumpkin spice. Walk away. There is still time.