Watch this Southern Lawyer's Viral Arby's Rant [VIDEO]

One week has passed since we were gifted with what may be the greatest video of all time.

I know--I know--I know what you're thinking: the greatest video? OF ALL TIME?

That's a pretty bold statement, especially when "Road Work Ahead?" "Hey, Duck!" and whatever this is exist, but please, dear reader, let me assure you that they all pale in comparison to the video you're about to watch.

Attorney John Morgan (yes--THAT John Morgan) shared his hot take to Facebook on Monday, February 1st. It has been shared over 4,800 times since then, and this is why.

(Warning: there are a few curse words in the video so pop in your earbuds or wait until your boss isn't hovering over your cubicle before you press play.)

FIRST OF ALL: Hilarious.

Is Arby's a money laundering front? Who DOES eat there?

I mean, yeah, I hit up Arby's like once a year, but is that kind of sporadic patronage enough to support a business?

And don't come for my boy John for cursing. I have ALWAYS felt that any casual conversation can be improved by a carefully placed curse word, and Attorney John Morgan is offering us a MASTER CLASS on how and when to cuss.

This entire 60 second rant is just... *chef's kiss*

I am OBSESSED. I have showed it to everyone I know a minimum of fifteen times.

Thank you, John Morgan, for bestowing us with this, the most blessed content.