The Great Pumpkin Carving Contest: Meg Summers’ Entry [PHOTOS]

We were all challenged to carve a pumpkin this weekend. This would prove to be an arduous task as A) I have no real pumpkin carving skills and B) I am revolted by pumpkin "guts." Do not, dear reader, doubt me for a second; I rose to the challenge and far surpassed all expectations with the GREATEST PUMPKIN EVER. OF ALL TIME. Or at least among my co-workers.

I brought home my decorative gourd this weekend and had like NO CLUE as to carve the bad boy. I thought I'd let my daughter check the pumpkin out and see if she could help her mom come up with a plan.

No ideas followed. Plenty of adorbs, yes--but a solid plan we did not create. She slapped the pumpkin around for a solid five minutes like it was a dang bongo drum and she was Matthew McCounaughey. Then my husband got called in to work and Project Pumpkin was put on hold as I'm not really down with wielding a knife near a toddler without the assistance of another less accident-prone adult.

I spent some time scouring the interwebs for additional inspiration, and then BAM. I had an amazing idea. Actually carving the pumpkin was next.

Gross. Remember carving a pumpkin as a kid and feeling all magical while you got to pull out the pumpkin "guts?" It was cool back then, but now... not so much. I had barely cracked open my pumpkin when I got a speck of its innards on my bare hand and then IT WAS ON.

And by "it" I mean my cleaning gloves, because let's be real: gourd guts are gross. I used an ice cream scoop to keep the stinky seedy pulp as far away from me as possible. After I gutted my gourd, I began to carve away.

I was done in about five minutes. I was so proud of myself. I mean, it's not like I did something as cool as this or this or this, but my pumpkin is totally superior to any/all pumpkins carved by my co-workers. Check it.

Rad, right? You've got to give me mad points for creativity here. Hope you enjoy my pukey pumpkin masterpiece. Happy Halloween!